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lucysnewmum
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PostSubject: What's the point of dogs?   Thu Jan 14, 2010 9:18 pm

Read an articl today - made me giggle - would like to share! this is the edited version cos it was a bit long and i dont want to get RSI!!!!lol

"these four legged, tail wagging, wet nosed buffoons are as much use a Father's day present and as thick as minestrone soup."

"A dog is happiest in a field with a stick. Its idea of a good time is rolling in fox poo then bowling home for a feed and 40 winks. If he can chase
a pheasant, bark at a leaf, stick his head down a hole and disappear over the horizon for most of the day in a hopeless quest for a small, furry mammal, so much the better."

" A lamp post does not define its social life"

"Here are the 20 simple rules a dog must follow:-

1. The biggest and best sofa in the house is the dog's spiritual and actual bed

2. The area between any open doorway is for sleeping in

3. The sitting room carpet is to be used as a doormat and napkin

4. The entire inside of the car belongs to the dog

5. A dog has proprietory rights over a pheasant.

6. Its a dog's duty to chase anything with fur and four legs to the ends of the earth and refuse to return

7. All animal droppings are interesting and well worth rolling in

8. A river is for jumping in, especially near fishermen

9. A dog should shake itself dry inside the house

10.There is no such thing as bad food

11.Supper can be supplemented by tearing open bin liners

12. Farting is a perfectly acceptable way of showing appreciation for a meal

13. Bad breath is mandatory

14. Starvation can be abated by the dog resting its head in the crutch of the dinner guest

15. There is no object which is not worth sniffing or cocking one's leg at

16. The more disgusting the object the more attention it deserves

17. Television remote controls are acceptable substitutes for bones

18. Thunderstorms are a sign that the world is coming to an end. Humans should be warned by rolling of the eyes, shaking, and panting

19. Even on the dryest day a dog is required to find a puddle to walk in before going home

20. Finally, wagging the tail, while standing stock still, with an unblinking stare, will lead to the provision of all doggy needs, with the exception of sex, which can be enjoyed any other time with any breed or the human leg
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Shells_k
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PostSubject: Re: What's the point of dogs?   Thu Jan 14, 2010 9:30 pm

LOL, good one Gillie Exclamation
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Steven_L
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PostSubject: Re: What's the point of dogs?   Fri Jan 15, 2010 4:35 pm

Hehehe definitely puts a smile on your face. Very Happy

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Betterdog4u
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PostSubject: Re: What's the point of dogs?   Fri Jan 15, 2010 6:44 pm

excellent post .... 2 pts

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schnauzkyLVR
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PostSubject: Re: What's the point of dogs?   Fri Jan 22, 2010 5:45 pm

lol..nice one hehe Razz
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Samm-ban
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PostSubject: Re: What's the point of dogs?   Sun Feb 07, 2010 12:19 pm

Great post! LOL

i do have to add to this

All animal droppings are interesting and well worth rolling in

that if they are worth smelling and rolling in..its sure worth the dogs time to give them a little taste and see if they are edible.

Being on a farm, the cow poo is a favorite snack.
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Steven_L
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PostSubject: Re: What's the point of dogs?   Tue Feb 09, 2010 7:55 pm

Samm-ban wrote:
Great post! LOL

i do have to add to this

All animal droppings are interesting and well worth rolling in

that if they are worth smelling and rolling in..its sure worth the dogs time to give them a little taste and see if they are edible.

Being on a farm, the cow poo is a favorite snack.

Lol, very true....unfortunately I have to DRAG junior away from horse poo.lol.

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